Monday, October 11, 2004

tony sebok: the drinking game

perhaps there are others of you who, like me, are unable to focus for two straight hours on sebok's lecture. for those of you who feel my pain, i proundly present to you tony sebok: the drinking game.

here's how it works: get yourself a nice 40 oz. malted beverage, a bottle of scotch, or perhaps a quart of your favorite mixed drink. if you are really in the sebok spirit, you may wish to play with the biggest cup of coffee you can find. the game starts when sebok says "let's get started," and it ends when sebok dismisses class, you pass out, or urinate in your pants, whichever happens first.

the following list shows the sebokian behavior you're looking for, and the resulting action on your part...

  • every time sebok says, "um" or "uh"... drink one
  • if he mentions menlove, or calls something menlovian... drink one
  • whenever he stands with one foot on his podium, drink two while admiring his slacks
  • if he mentions "multiple" or "joint tortfeasors," say cheers to your drinking buddies in class and drink three
  • if he casually compares the instant case to any other case in the book... drink continuously while madly flipping through your notes to figure out what he's talking about
  • if he makes a chart on the board, drink one for each column he draws
  • if he draws a diagram of a car / boat accident... drink four
  • if he draws a bell curve, chug as much as you can, then pour the remaining contents over your head
  • whenever sebok holds a piece of chalk in his hand, then folds that hand / arm behind his back and paces the room, fold one of your arms behind your back, and drink continuously until he either stops pacing or brings his arm back out to the front of his body
  • whenever he drinks, so do you
  • if sebok kung-fu's someone's bag or backpack... drink three
  • if he says the word "zipursky"... drink two
  • if he says the word "goldberg"... drink three
  • if he refers to zipursky and goldberg as his "posse"... let the posse of people sitting around you have a drink
  • whenever sebok gets really excited, and starts using that kermit the frog voice... drink continuously until he returns to his normal tone of voice. if you finish your drink and he's still in kermit mode, hit yourself over the head with your glass until he's done.
  • if you ever get the guy to laugh, or if he laughs at one of his own jokes... pour the rest of your beverage down the front of your pants
have fun everyone! i may have left a few rules out. if anyone thinks of any others, please post them here. cheers!

-menlove

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10 Comments:

At 9:24 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

who is the menlove writing these blogs?

 
At 9:52 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

dont listen to that guy. I would like to comend you for your finely written and insightful blog. It brightens up my day. Honestly. You deserve your anonymity, and a prize. keep it up. You are on the right side of the blog-writing bellcurve.

 
At 10:36 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Personally, I think your blog quality took a dive when you found out people were reading it.
I also think you have a serious latent homosexual desire for Sebok.

 
At 10:37 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i would have to agree, good job on the blogs, but i wouldn't mind knowing who you were as well. or, maybe you can give us a hint each day. it can be another we can all play with sebok

 
At 11:21 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

whoever wrote the nasty comment is an asshole. Yor blog is great, and so is the fact that its annonymous.

 
At 3:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

How about when he leans against the wall with one hand inside his pants pocket? How many drinks would that be worth?

 
At 4:17 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I don't know but I bet menlove likey likes that

 
At 10:17 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

how the hell am I supposed to read this stuff at 10am on Mondays and Wednesdays (as you so subtly suggest) when I keep cracking up and am forced to bury my head blow the desk. Not fair. This shit is too funny.

 
At 5:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

thanks for the laughs. keep it anonymous - wouldn't work otherwise.

 
At 9:09 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

ummmm, I though I was the only one who noticed the kermit the frog voice, I kept looking around the room to see if anyone else was making a face when he would do it. Now I don't feel so alone...How am i supposed to concentrate in class now.....

 

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